Muddled Mind

Sometimes I want to write.

Sometimes I feel the need to write.

Tonight my mind is too full to do so.

I have written words of a demon tied to a hunter, of a shark drawn to a dolphin, and of a reaper caring for a fox. But they were all short and void of the feelings I wanted.

My mind is muddled.

Even sitting here, listening to the words of the songs that reflect the feelings in the stories I am working on I can’t seem to see the scenes. I can’t touch the characters. I can’t be in the moment they are in.

I want to write them so badly, not just for those that I know read the stories I post, but for the sake of the characters themselves. Their stories need told. They deserve for the their stories to be shared, but I can’t seem to find the words to do so, at least not tonight.

I have a demon who still needs to fall in love with the daughter of his partner.

I have a high school boy who needs to accept that he is loved, even when he doesn’t feel loveable.

I have a reaper who still needs to tell the woman he has been following for over a century how he feels about her.

I have a fox and a satyr that I need to lead to their deaths.

I have a kitsune god and a tengu god that need to find a home.

I have a dark elf who needs to find her jester.

I have characters that are relying on me to finish their tales, to bring their stories to a climax and ending, to bring them to a place of ending… and I can’t seem to.

Maybe I will try again tomorrow.

The Beginning…

So, it’s been a long time since I’ve tried starting a blog. It’s not out of a lack of desire, simply unmotivation. So here’s to a new one, hoping that perhaps, given a little luck, this one will stick.

I have been seeking a writing outlet I suppose. I enjoy my fiction, love it actually. But writing fiction is often slow and tedious, with little to no feedback from those who read it. I am not seeking feedback here (although, all authors love feedback), I am simply looking to write and connect with those around me.

Sometimes I feel as though I would float away into my imagination if I weren’t securely anchored to my body. It’s as if I could close my eyes, slip away and never return to reality, simply float in the fictional realms I have created, residing with the characters I have created. However, I am not sure I would be welcome with them. They don’t need me around, they don’t know me or desire to know me, they have their lives with their families and I have mine.

I can’t tell you what may end up on this screen for you to read. It might be some of my characters coming by to say hello. It might be my thoughts on the traffic I faced today. It could be what I made for dinner three nights ago. It could be pictures of my furbabies. It might be heartache or joy, but I can tell you one thing… it will be me.

For now I will leave you with a picture of my brother and I, because I love it.

Featured image